Lessons From Fatherhood

This much I know, or think I do, if I could remember…..

  1. Sleep deprivation
  2. Polarn Y Pyret addiction
  3. The difference between a pram and a 3 way travel system
  4. Happiness
  5. Tolerance of the smell of sick. And poo.
  6. Jedi awareness of toys on the floor (takes time and highly variable following repeated times standing on sharp edges in bare feet)
  7. Sub- Redcoat style cabaret skills
  8. Empathy
  9. Tiny skulls are surprisingly rock hard when they headbutt you
  10. Magic kisses work better than the magic sponge
  11. Time is precious
  12. You’re nowhere near as important as you thought you were; that’s not a bad thing
  13. Dante missed out the level of Hell which is soft play on a Saturday
  14. How important it is to say ‘I love you’ every day. At least.
  15. The kids’ disco on holiday is better than any club you’ve ever been to
  16. Dora, Diego and Handy Manny don’t actually give you a functional level of Spanish
  17. Some kids are just arseholes (never yours)
  18. Grandparents are shining stars, even if they would have never let you away with half of what they do now
  19. Early mornings can beat late nights
  20. Juggling (mainly metaphorical, sometimes literal)
  21. Pride
  22. The John Lewis nursery department are invaluable
  23. Mum knows best
  24. You’ll be an embarrassment before you know it
  25. A trip to A&E’s not the end of the world; they break, they mend.
  26. (Some) parenting books are written by the delusional. Or liars
  27. You have a legitimate excuse to eat fish fingers
  28. All the sounds you’ve every heard are like a distant, discordant din compared to the laughter of your child.

Please comment